So today I binge watched Stranger Things 2 and yes IT WAS AWESOME! Seriously looking forward to season 3! I have been thinking about one of the new characters “Billy Hargrove” played by Darce Montgomery, the new Hawkins resident bully! As most people know... I don't fancy bullies but Darce's performance along side his Co-Star Will Chase who played his father “Neil Hargrove” has opened my eyes to something bigger, something we generally don't see or think about when dealing with a bully.
The writer's Matt and Ross Duffer alongside director Shawn Levy have given a glimpse as to how a bully in certain cercumstances is created, how this young man who in one breath is charming and charismatic and in the next is cunning and down right cruel. I have dealt with my fair share of bullies in my time and the truth be told I have always thought if they had a stricter upbringing they wouldn’t treat others as they do... now my eyes have been opened to the reality that some bullies are simply being taught to bully.
This has been on my mind since I watched the home scene in the “Hargrove Home”, I don’t want to go to deep into it because I don’t want to spoil it for anyone who hasn’t watched (Side Note: GO WATCH IT!) so bare with my somewhat cryptic thoughts. From the beginning I thought “Billy was just a typical bully, a boy who simply doesn’t give a shit about anything that doesn’t benefit him. Then later into the series I realized how my thinking of not only this character but more than likely bullies I have encountered in the past was rather narrow minded. I made assumptions that all bullies are just cruel and mean for kicks and I was wrong. UNDERSTAND I am in no way condoning the behavior I’m simply saying I see it from a different light and perspective.
Matt and Ross Duffer and Shawn Levy have done something courageous in my opinion, they have shined a light on a subject that often gets overlooked, how violent actions of a parent can in turn teach a child to be violent to others. Domestic Violence is usually thought of as something between to adults, what about how that same violence can be directed at a child... The actions in how we treat others and treat children is how they developed into the adults they become. Now with that said not all children who come from households with domestic violence are violent or cruel, infact more often than not people who go through these experiences see the world with a kind and open heart. Sadly for “Billy” he takes it out on the world, when I was watching the scene between Darce and Will my heart broke. I wanted to reach into the TV and hug Billy, again the realization of Billy's home life doesn't make his actions acceptable.
I myself have seen domestic violence and childhood sexual assault and for me personally I was always afraid, I never wanted to say or do the wrong thing to anyone. I always wanted to help people, see the good hidden within the bad. That is more likely than not the reason I have been hurt by people most would have normally walked away from had I not had those experiences. Sadly this had carried over into adaulthood for me... I’ve made strides to better assess situations...
No-one adult or child should have to suffer through violence at home, if you or someone you know who has been through domestic violence click here to request a journal, everyone deserves a safe place to express themselves and heal.
Back to the Stranger Things series!!! SO Great, Love this series! I can't wait for season 3, I hope it is sooner than later! If you haven't seen the series you are missing out! GO BINGE WATCH IT ASAP! I promise you won't be disappointed!!! Thanks for reading everyone! God Bless!
Author ~ Talie Marie
I have decided to keep a digital journal/blog to share my day to day experiences with my life after sexual assault and with my charity The Talie Marie Foundation. I have over the years tried to do both and unfortunately I hadn't had success, this will help me not only be more consistent but also help me with opening myself up to the people around me. I believe in that having hope & opening your heart with forgiveness has been a large part of my recovery process. I'm a member of the RAINN Speakers Bureau, The nation's largest anti-sexual violence organization. I decided to join the RAINN team in the spring of 2011 along with writing and working to publish my book about my own experiences dealing with sexual and domestic violence in my life to be release in 2017. I have dedicated my life to raising awareness and educating victims and their families on the resources available to them not only in the USA but worldwide. Thank you for taking this journey with me. ~ Talie Marie